Wit Quotes

#1. Erm…I don't know maybe for kissing me and tasting so damn delicious, maybe for holding my hand in public, maybe for looking far too hot in that sexy, snug tee when you should just be looking like Jo's little brother.
The words were on the tip of my tongue, but I chose the much more sophisticated reaction of scowling, hard. I would have kicked him again, but I was convinced he'd moved his legs out of the way. Coward." ~ Ella, A Perfect Moment #Quote by Becca Lee

#2. Though not really a comedy, 'Rosewater' is a demonstration of the creed behind 'The Daily Show': belief in the crucial need for impious wit against entrenched power. The freedom of the press is also the freedom to depress - and to inspire. That's a message that can outlive any Oscar season. #Quote by Richard Corliss

#3. It was wonderful flirting with him, all the razor-edged literary banter, like Beatrice and Benedick in Much Ado About Nothing. A battle of wit, and a test, too. #Quote by Elizabeth Wein

#4. Jack shall have Jill.
Nought shall go ill. #Quote by William Shakespeare

#5. It was while Princess Margaret was attending a high-society party in New York that the hostess asked her politely how the Queen was keeping. "Which one?" she is reported to have replied with her typically razor-sharp wit. "My sister, my mother or my husband? #Quote by Princess Margaret

#6. All that stock of arguments [the skeptics] produce to depreciate our faculties, and make mankind appear ignorant and low, are drawn principally from this head, to wit, that we are under an invincible blindness as to the true and real nature of things. #Quote by George Berkeley

#7. Wonderful is the wit and subtiltie that dumb creatures have & how they shift for themselves and annoy their enemies: which is the only difficultie that they have to arise and grow to so great an height and excessive bignesse. The dragon therefore espying the Elephant when he goeth to releese, assaileth him from an high tree and launceth himselfe upon him; but the Elephant knowing well enough well enough he is not able to withstand his windings and knittings about him, seeketh to come close to some trees or hard rockes, and so forth to crush and squise the dragon between him and them: the dragons ware hereof, entangle and snarle his feet and legges first with their taile: the Elephants on the other side, undoe those knots with their trunke as with a hand: but to prevent that againe, the dragons put in their heads into their snout, and so stop their breath, and withall, fret and gnaw the tenderest parts that they find there.

(Translated by Philomel Holland, 1601.
"The Book of Naturalists: An Anthology of the Best Natural History", 1944. p. 20) #Quote by Pliny The Elder

#8. He is a first-rate collector who can, upon all occasions, collect his wits. #Quote by George D. Prentice

#9. Big words from a guy who's trussed up like a turkey. What are you going to do, wobble over here like an upside- down turtle to snap me in half?"
"The logistics of breaking you are easy. The only question is when. #Quote by Susan Ee

#10. When [Claudette Colbert] died at 92, on July 30, 1996, her front-page New York Times obit recalled her "wit, gaiety, cupid'sbow mouth and light touch ... worldly and sophisticated yet down to earth." Claudette herself was quoted, "I've always believed that acting is instinct to start with; you either have it or you don't ... I did comedy because all my life I always wanted to laugh myself. There was never anything that gave me as much satisfaction as to be in something amusing. #Quote by Eve Golden

#11. Wit is artificial; humor is natural. Wit is accidental; humor is inevitable. Wit is born of conscious effort; humor, of the allotted ironies of fate. Wit can be expressed only in language; humor can be developed sufficiently in situation. #Quote by Agnes Repplier

#12. The impromptu reply is precisely the touchstone of the man of wit. #Quote by Moliere

#13. At the best, sarcasms, bitter irony, scathing wit, are a sort of swordplay of the mind. You pink your adversary, and he is forthwith dead; and then you deserve to be hung for it. #Quote by Christian Nestell Bovee

#14. Drink up cause everyone here is good tonight. Except the niggas that I came wit, they good for life #Quote by Drake

#15. how cruel i was to myself. giving you credit for my warmth simply because you had felt it. thinking it was you who gave me strength. wit. beauty. simply because you recognized it. as if i was already not those things before i met you. as if i did not remain all these once you left. #Quote by Rupi Kaur

#16. The novel ... creates a bemusing effect. The short story, on the other hand wakes the reader up. Not only that, it answers the primitive craving for art, the wit, paradox and beauty of shape, the longing to see a dramatic pattern and significance in our experience. #Quote by V.S. Pritchett

#17. For all the ugly vices that capitalism encourages, it's at least interesting, exciting, it offers possiblities. In America, the struggle is at least an individual struggle. And if the individual has strength enough of character, salt enough of wit, the alternatives are thicker than polyesters in a car salesman's closet. In a socialistic system, you're no better or no worse than anybody else.'
But that's equality!'
Bullshit. Unromantic, unattractive bullshit. Equality is not in regarding different things similarly, equality is in regarding different things differently. #Quote by Tom Robbins

#18. The wisdom that is from above, is not only pure, but also peaceable and gentle; and the lack of these qualifications, like the dead fly in the jar of ointment, will spoil the fragrance and efficacy of our labors. If we act in a wrong spirit - we shall bring little glory to God; do little good to our fellow creatures; and procure neither honor nor comfort to ourselves! If you can be content with showing your wit, and gaining the laugh on your side - you have an easy task! #Quote by John Newton

#19. Laugh not too much; the witty man laughs least: For wit is news only to ignorance. Lesse at thine own things laugh; lest in the jest Thy person share, and the conceit advance. #Quote by George Herbert

#20. A lot of Christians like to remind me that heaven is my true home, which makes me want to ask them if they would like to go home first. #Quote by Kate Bowler

#21. Wit must be foiled by wit: cut a diamond with a diamond. #Quote by William Congreve

#22. To which I answered, That the intent of my coming thither, and to other places, was to instruct, and counsel people to forsake their sins, and close in with Christ, lest they did miserably perish; and that I could do both these without confusion (to wit), follow my calling, and preach the Word also. #Quote by John Bunyan

#23. When I battle wits with Jarod Kintz I always feel like I need to take my brain out to give him a transplant. Bad part is we don't have any. #Quote by Will Advise

#24. Never ask while you are doing it if what you are doing is fun. Don't introduce even your most reliably witty acquaintance as someone who will set the table on a roar. #Quote by Christopher Hitchens

#25. Wit implies hatred or contempt of folly and crime, produces its effects by brisk shocks of surprise, uses the whip of scorpions and the branding-iron, stabs, stings, pinches, tortures, goads, teases, corrodes, undermines. #Quote by Edwin Percy Whipple

#26. But I have a flash of Good News from the Police Atrocity front, which is heating up in Denver. ... Stand back! Good News is rare in the Criminal Justice System, but every once in a while you find it, and this is one of those times. To wit: the National Association of Criminal Defense Lawyers has formally entered the Appeals trial of young Lisl Auman - the girl who remains locked up in a cell at the Colorado State Prison for the Rest of Her Life with No Possibility of Parole for a bogus crime she was never even Accused of committing. She is a living victim of a cold-blooded political trial that will cast a long shadow on Denver for many years to come. Lisl is the only person ever convicted in the United States for Felony Murder who was in police custody when the crime happened. #Quote by Hunter S. Thompson

#27. I have no wit, no words, no tears;
My heart within me like a stone
Is numb'd too much for hopes or fears;
Look right, look left, I dwell alone;
I lift mine eyes, but dimm'd with grief
No everlasting hills I see;
My life is in the falling leaf:
O Jesus, quicken me. #Quote by Christina Rossetti

#28. So now I'm rollin' down Rodeo wit a shotgun, These people ain't seen a brown skin man, Since their grandparents bought one #Quote by Zack De La Rocha

#29. My temper is not spoilt. I am absolutely non-homicidal. Nor do I ever attack unless I have been attacked first, and then Heaven have mercy upon the attacker, because I don't! I just sharpen my wits on a wooden head as a cat sharpens its claws on the wood legs of a table. #Quote by Edith Sitwell

#30. The distrust of wit is the beginning of tyranny. #Quote by Edward Abbey

#31. For we seldom admire the wit, when we dislike the man. #Quote by Jeremiah Seed

#32. In the midst of the fountain of wit there arises something bitter, which stings in the very flowers. #Quote by Lucretius

#33. To aspire to be superhuman is a most discreditable admission that you lack the guts, the wit, the moderating judgment to be successfully and consummately human. #Quote by Aldous Huxley

#34. If you've brains it's better than beauty - brains last, beauty doesn't. #Quote by L.M. Montgomery

#35. It is one of the triumphs of human wit ... to conquer by humility and submissiveness ... to make oneself small in order to appear great ... such ... are often the expedients of the neurotic. #Quote by Alfred Adler

#36. In the whole history of the world there is but one thing that money cannot buy ... to wit
the wag of a dog's tail. #Quote by Josh Billings

#37. Age was a demon, a haunting that slipped into the bones whispering weakness and frailty. It stole his muscles, his agility, and the quickness of his wit. It seemed a miserable reward for surviving, all things told, which was proof enough that life was a fool's bargain. #Quote by Steven Erikson

#38. Go, little book, and wish to all
Flowers in the garden, meat in the hall,
A bin of wine, a spice of wit,
A house with lawns enclosing it,
A living river by the door,
A nightingale in the sycamore! #Quote by Robert Louis Stevenson

#39. The Wit of Cheats, the Courage of a Whore,
Are what ten thousand envy and adore:
All, all look up, with reverential Awe,
At crimes that 'scape, or triumph o'er the Law:
While Truth, Worth, Wisdom, daily they decry-`
'Nothing is sacred now but Villainy'

- Epilogue to the Satires, Dialogue I #Quote by Alexander Pope

#40. I think puns are not just the lowest form of wit, but the lowest form of human behavior. #Quote by John Oliver

#41. Nothing can atone for the lack of modesty; without which beauty is ungraceful and wit detestable. #Quote by Richard Steele

#42. Necessity can sharpen the wits even of children. #Quote by Timothy Dwight V

#43. A proverb is the wisdom of many and the wit of one. #Quote by Lord John Russell

#44. Come Sleep! Oh Sleep, the certain knot of peace, the baiting-place of wit, the balm of woe, the poor man's wealth, the prisoner's release, the indifferent judge between the high and low. #Quote by Philip Sidney

#45. So many heads so many wits. #Quote by John Heywood

#46. Wit and wisdom differ; wit is upon the sudden turn, wisdom is bringing about ends. #Quote by John Selden

#47. A man must keep his earnestness nimble, to escape ridicule. #Quote by D.H. Lawrence

#48. The foolishness of men who care, Dalinar," Wit said. "And the brilliance of those who do not. The second depend on the first - but also exploit the first - while the first misunderstand the second, hoping that the second are more like the first. And all of their games steal our time. Second by second. #Quote by Brandon Sanderson

#49. I wish I had fallen in love with somebody a little more handsome, of course. But I didn't. I fell in love wit you. #Quote by Haruki Murakami

#50. Who, born for the universe, narrow'd his mind, And to party gave up what was meant for mankind; Though fraught with all learning, yet straining his throat To persuade Tommy Townshend to lend him a vote. Who too deep for his hearers still went on refining, And thought of convincing while they thought of dining: Though equal to all things, for all things unfit; Too nice for a statesman, too proud for a wit. #Quote by Oliver Goldsmith

#51. One of the attractions of translating 'Heroes' is that it's not the kind of play that I write. If it had been, I probably wouldn't have wanted to translate it. There are no one-liners. It's much more a truthful comedy than a play of dazzling wit. #Quote by Tom Stoppard

#52. The thing that makes our friendships so short and changeable is that the qualities and dispositions of the soul are very hard to know, and those of the understanding and wit very easy. #Quote by Francois De La Rochefoucauld

#53. Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice should create in the discerning male reader a deeply rooted concupiscence for Elizabeth Bennet that springs not from her vivacity or from her wit but from her unerring instinct to follow the deeply moral directives of her own character even against the influences and arguments of society, of convention, of seeming necessity, and of her friends and family. Properly read, Austen should be a form of pornography for the morally and spiritually discriminating man. #Quote by Gerald Weaver

#54. Magick isn't every answer. A body must know how to fend for himself without it as well. A gift should never be squandered on what you can do with your wit and your hands or your back. #Quote by Nora Roberts

#55. Wit, who never once Forgave a brother, shall forgive a dunce. #Quote by Charles Churchill

#56. Wit is the epitaph of an emotion. #Quote by Friedrich Nietzsche

#57. Sometimes advises from others are more difficult to bear with than even slang. #Quote by Amit Kalantri

#58. A choking dry-ice smog of disappointment, pooling in the drops and troughs of suddenly uncertain ground. Mudyards, wit here and there the smoking wrecks of ideologies, their wheels and radios gone. River of litter rustling in a swollen course below the sky's black drag and in the ditches mustard gas, a mulch of sodden colouring books, imploded television sets.

These are the fretful margins of twentieth century, the boomtowns ragged edge, out past the sink estates, the human landfill, where the wheelchair access paving quakes, gives way like sphagnum moss beneath our feet. It's 1999, less like date than like a number we restore to in emergencies. pre-packaged in its national front hunting. It's millennial mummy-wraps. The zeitgeist yawns, as echoing and hollow as the Greenwich dome.

It's April 10th; we find ourselves in red lion square....caught in the crosshairs of geography and time like sitting ducks, held always by surface tension of the instant, by the sensory dazzle. Constant play of light on neural ripples. Fluttering attention pinned to where and when and who we are. The honey-trap of our personal circumstance, of our familiar bodies restless in these chairs. #Quote by Alan Moore

#59. Remember that nothing will supply the want of prudence, and that negligence and irregularity long continued will make knowledge useless, wit ridiculous, and genius contemptible. #Quote by Samuel Johnson

#60. Don't neglect these tools in your journey : an eye to look and see and to differentiate flowers from leaves, a mind to comprehend and be focused, ears to listen and hear, a heart to understand what is truly worth our time and what not to give attention to, and a good strength to dare unceasingly in wit and with courage, focusing on only the true factors of the matters that truly matter for distinctive footprints in the end! #Quote by Ernest Agyemang Yeboah

#61. I wondered what he would have thought if he'd known that I'd gleaned most of my information from reading historical romance novels. #Quote by Nicole Luiken

#62. Of course, there is a portion of reading quite indispensable to a wise man. History and exact science he must learn by laborious reading. Colleges, in like manner, have their indispensable office, - to teach elements. But they can only highly serve us, when they aim not to drill, but to create; when they gather from far every ray of various genius to their hospitable halls, and, by the concentrated fires, set the hearts of their youth on flame. Thought and knowledge are natures in which apparatus and pretension avail nothing. Gowns, and pecuniary foundations, though of towns of gold, can never countervail the least sentence or syllable of wit. Forget this, and our American colleges will recede in their public importance, whilst they grow richer every year. #Quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson

#63. Today, names of screenwriters like Zoe Akins, Jeanie Macpherson, Beulah Marie Dix, Lenore Coffee, Anita Loos, June Mathis, Bess Meredyth, Jane Murfin, Adela Rogers St. Johns, Sonya Levien, and Salka Viertel are too often found only in the footnotes of Hollywood histories. But seventy years ago, they were highly paid, powerful players at the studios that churned out films at the rate of one a week. And for over twenty-five years, no writer was more sought after than Frances Marion; with her versatile pen and a caustic wit, she was a leading participant and witness to one of the most creative eras for women in American history. #Quote by Cari Beauchamp

#64. Wit doesn't make girls pretty. #Quote by Jeanne Calment

#65. Zorro also is part of the bandido tradition, most closely associated with the possibly mythical Joaquin Murrieta and the historical Tiburcio Vasquez. As well as these local California legendary figures, Zorro is an American version of Robin Hood and similar heroes whose stories blend fiction and history, thus moving Zorro into the timeless realm of legend. The original story takes place in the Romantic era, but, more important, Zorro as Diego adds an element of poetry and sensuality, and as Zorro the element of sexuality, to the traditional Western hero. Not all Western heroes are, as D. H. Lawrence said of Cooper's Deerslayer, "hard, isolate, stoic, and a killer," but in the Western genre the hero and villain more often than not share these characteristics. What distinguishes Zorro is a gallantry, a code of ethics, a romantic sensibility, and most significant, a command of language and a keen intelligence and wit. #Quote by Robert E. Morsberger

#66. Jules: Shadowhunters take in Shadowhunters. It's what we do.
Kit: You really think that's such a good idea? I mean, your house is pretty screwed up, what wit hyour agoraphhobic uncle and your weird brother.
Jules: Ty isn't weird.
Kit: I meant Mark, Ty isn't weird. He's just autistic. it's not a big deal. Back when I went to mundane school, I knew some kids who were on the spectrum. Ty has some things in common with them.
Jules: What spectrum?
Kit: You really don't know what I mean? #Quote by Cassandra Clare

#67. Mab Jones' poetry is suffused with a cool wit and a wisdom beyond her years. She is a superb performance poet in the tradition of Joolz Denby and Pam Ayres and, like them, her work is beautifully layered and contains bittersweet depths. #Quote by Phill Jupitus

#68. Fashion is always silly, for, before it can spread far, it must be calculated for silly people; as examples of sense, wit, or ingenuity could be imitated only by a few. #Quote by Horace Walpole

#69. Steven dreamed of you the very second
you died
(So the poem goes)
and you may have visited him
But I'm pretty sure you don't believe
in poems #Quote by Jon Paul Fiorentino

#70. This doesn't have to be anything more than what we want, Andra. We don't need to define this. You are warm, honest, beautiful, and full of wit. I appreciate how vibrant you are, and how you challenge me. I want to spend time with you simply because I enjoy being around you." I heard his sigh. "I don't want to suffocate you. No labels, no drama. Just fun. Maybe a kiss or two."
"Or three. Or four," I added. #Quote by Whitney Barbetti

#71. Death has no wit #Quote by Akinwale Musa Oluseun

#72. Of all wit's uses, the main one is to live well with who has none. #Quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson

#73. It's interesting that Melburnians don't tell jokes about Sydney. They tell jokes about their beloved footy. To wit: A man arriving for the Grand Final in Melbourne is surprised to find the seat beside his empty. Tickets for the Grand Final are sold out weeks in advance and empty seats unknown. So he says to the man on the other side of the seat: 'Excuse me, do you know why there is no one in this seat?' 'It was my wife's,' answers the second man, a touch wistfully, 'but I'm afraid she died.' 'Oh, that's terrible. I'm so sorry.' 'Yes, she never missed a match.' 'But couldn't you have given the ticket to a friend or relative?' 'Oh no. They're all at the funeral. #Quote by Bill Bryson

#74. It is not wit merely, but temper, which must form the well-bred man. In the same manner it is not a head merely, but a heart and resolution, which must complete the real philosopher. #Quote by Anthony Ashley-Cooper, 7th Earl Of Shaftesbury

#75. It's interesting that the woman who wrote that treatise – the one you all practically worship in Alethkar –decided that all of the feminine tasks involve sitting around having fun while all the masculine ones involve finding someone to stick a spear in you. Telling, eh? #Quote by Brandon Sanderson

#76. If Christ were here there is one thing he would not be - a Christian. #Quote by Mark Twain

#77. And for God's sake, if you need to shoot make sure to release the safety , he murmured, as we moved across the front, careful to stick to the shadows as often as we could. So far, I hadn't seen anyone, not even zombies. It wasn't uncommon for a straggler to come along, every now and then. Lucky for us, we were remote enough that we hadn't had any major issues with any hordes locating us. The men were quick to dispatch any zombies that hung around, not willing to take the risk that somehow they could communicate with each other. Not to mention, the zombies were strong and fast. It was better to end them, rather than to risk them one day killing one of us. #Quote by Rose Wynters

#78. This is the time to remember that I'm the protagonist in my own story, facing every challenge with grace and wit. #Quote by Maya Van Wagenen

#79. She wished she had a set of greeting cards at the ready, but Hallmark probably didn't make any that said Thank you for giving up your life so that me and my friends could escape! It was SO appreciated. XOXO! #Quote by Gina Damico

#80. I'll be there for you, I will care for you, I keep thinking you just don't know. Tryna run from that, say you're done wit that, on your face girl it just don't show. #Quote by Drake

#81. Alternative medicine people call themselves "holistic" and say it's the "whole" approach. Well, if it's the whole approach, let it be the mind as well. Use logic, use sense, use the incredible five wits you were given by creation. #Quote by Stephen Fry

#82. The alley is a pitch for about twenty women leaning in doorways, chain-smoking. In their shiny open raincoats, short skirts, cheap boots, and high-heeled shoes they watch the street with hooded eyes, like spies in a B movie. Some are young and pretty, and some are older, and some of them are very old, with facial expressions ranging from sullen to wry. Most of the commerce is centred on the slightly older women, as if the majority of the clients prefer experience and worldliness. The younger, prettier girls seem to do the least business, apparent innocence being only a minority preference, much as it is for the aging crones in the alley who seem as if they've been standing there for a thousand years.

In the dingy foyer of the hotel is an old poster from La Comédie Française, sadly peeling from the all behind the desk. Cyrano de Bergerac, it proclaims, a play by Edmond Rostand. I will stand for a few moments to take in its fading gaiety. It is a laughing portrait of a man with an enormous nose and a plumed hat. He is a tragic clown whose misfortune is his honour. He is a man entrusted with a secret; an eloquent and dazzling wit who, having successfully wooed a beautiful woman on behalf of a friend cannot reveal himself as the true author when his friend dies. He is a man who loves but is not loved, and the woman he loves but cannot reach is called Roxanne.

That night I will go to my room and write a song about a girl. I will call her Roxanne. I will conju #Quote by Sting

#83. Where do the biggest movie star of his generation and a revered director (and great actor in his own right) stay when they are visiting someone?
Would you believe the local Holiday Inn?
Hoping to forge a better connection to Chris, Clint Eastwood and Bradley Cooper came to see me and the rest of the family in early spring of 2014, before they started filming American Sniper. The unpretentiousness of their visit and their genuine goodwill floored me. It was a great omen for the movie.
Bubba and I picked them up at the local airport and brought them home; within minutes Bubba had Bradley out in the back playing soccer. Meanwhile, Clint and I talked inside. He reminded me of my grandfather with his courtly manners and gracious ways. He was very funny, with a quiet, quick wit and dry sense of humor. After dinner--it was an oryx Chris had killed shortly before he died--Bradley took Bubba to the Dairy Queen for dessert.
Even in small-town Texas, he couldn't quite get away without being recognized, and when someone asked for his photo, he stepped aside to pose. Bubba folded his arms across his chest and scanned the area much as his dad would have: on overwatch.
I guess I didn't really understand how unusual the situation was until later, when I dropped them off at the Holiday Inn. I watched them walk into the lobby and disappear.
That's Clint Eastwood and Bradley Cooper! Awesome! #Quote by Taya Kyle

#84. Rudolph Walsh, you are my fierce advocate, and your wit and wisdom #Quote by Curtis Sittenfeld

#85. One of the deep prejudices that the age of mechanism instilled in our culture, and that infects our religious and materialist fundamentalisms alike, is a version of the so-called genetic fallacy: to wit, the mistake of thinking that to have described a thing's material history or physical origins is to have explained that thing exhaustively. We tend to presume that if one can discover the temporally prior physical causes of some object - the world, an organism, a behavior, a religion, a mental event, an experience, or anything else - one has thereby eliminated all other possible causal explanations of that object. But this is a principle that is true only if materialism is true, and materialism is true only if this principle is true, and logical circles should not set the rules for our thinking. #Quote by David Bentley Hart

#86. Nothing is so fatiguing as the life of a wit ... #Quote by Hester Lynch Piozzi

#87. I got more than a thing for you, tattoo wit a ink for you right over my heart girl, I'll do the unthinkable. #Quote by Drake

#88. Simplicity, wit, and good typography. #Quote by Michael Bierut

#89. Snobbery might sometimes look cool, like smoking, but the end result is usually a repelling one. #Quote by Trent Zelazny

#90. Wine gives a man nothing ... it only puts in motion what had been locked up in frost. #Quote by Samuel Johnson

#91. In thy discourse, if thou desire to please;
All such is courteous, useful, new, or wittie:
Usefulness comes by labour, wit byease;
Courtesie grows in court; news in the citie. #Quote by George Herbert

#92. Sarcasm isn't the lowest form of wit. It isn't even wit at all. #Quote by John Flanagan

#93. This book bore the label R>3214 VIII/2. And this painful truth was suddenly borne in upon the mind of Monsieur Sariette: to wit, that the most scientific system of numbering will not help to find a book if the book is no longer in its place. #Quote by Anatole France

#94. They were eyes made for laughter, but not raucous yuks; rather, for the laughter of wit, of erudition, of the bon mot. #Quote by Stephen Hunter

#95. For if in careless summer days
In groves of Ashtaroth we whored,
Repentant now, when winds blow cold,
We kneel before our rightful lord;
The lord of all, the money-god,
Who rules us blood and hand and brain,
Who gives the roof that stops the wind,
And, giving, takes away again;
Who spies with jealous, watchful care,
Our thoughts, our dreams, our secret ways,
Who picks our words and cuts our clothes,
And maps the pattern of our days;
Who chills our anger, curbs our hope,
And buys our lives and pays with toys,
Who claims as tribute broken faith,
Accepted insults, muted joys;
Who binds with chains the poet's wit,
The navvy's strength, the soldier's pride,
And lays the sleek, estranging shield
Between the lover and his bride. #Quote by George Orwell

#96. I moved out of my head office and went out of my mind. #Quote by Benny Bellamacina

#97. I would recommend it to you to reflect, and remark on, and digest what you read; to enter into the spirit and design of your author; to observe every step he takes to accomplish his end; and to dwell on any remarkable beauties of diction, justness or sublimity of sentiment, or masterly strokes of true wit which may occur in the course of your reading. #Quote by Dumas Malone

#98. Next to being witty, the best thing is being able to quote another's wit. #Quote by Christian Nestell Bovee

#99. I definitely did look up to John. We all looked up to John. He was older and he was very much the leader; he was the quickest wit and the smartest. #Quote by Paul McCartney

#100. Wit generally succeeds more from being happily addressed than from its native poignancy. A jest, calculated to spread at a gaming-table, may be received with, perfect indifference should it happen to drop in a mackerel-boat. #Quote by Oliver Goldsmith

#101. As in smooth oil the razor best is whet, So wit is by politeness sharpest set; Their want of edge from their offence is seen, Both pain us least when exquisitely keen. #Quote by Edward Young

#102. There are essentially three types of people: those who love life more than they fear it, those who fear life more than they love it, and those who have no clue what I'm talking about. #Quote by Neel Burton

#103. Eric Schlosser's book on the economy and strategies of the fast-food business should be read by anyone who likes to take their children to fast-food restaurants. I shall certainly never do that again. He employs a long, cold burn, a quiet and impassioned accumulation of detail, with calm, wit and clarity. ( ... ) Fast Food Nation is witness to the rigour and seriousness of the best American journalism, readable, reliable and extremely carefully done. #Quote by Adam Nicolson

#104. By his own assessment, he was no genius. He had "no great quickness of apprehension or wit" or "power to follow a long and purely abstract train of thought." On the many occasions when I share those feelings, I find it encouraging to review those words because that Englishman did okay for himself - his name was Charles Darwin. #Quote by Leonard Mlodinow

#105. As the new day dawns, and my inkwell runs dry, I hereby make a vow. Not a vow to the man I once hoped to marry, but a promise to myself. From this morning forward, I will never shed another tear for him. There is no need. Because everything Lord Dashwood rejected when he so callously walked away - ­is mine to claim. Mine to use. My wit, my strength, and most of all - ­my heart. I will not put any of these on the shelf. #Quote by Tessa Dare

#106. But assuming the same premises, to wit, that all men are equal by the law of nature and of nations, the right of property in slaves falls to the ground; for one who is equal to another cannot be the owner or property of that other. #Quote by William H. Seward

#107. Careful as they may be, developers of Eiffel libraries will always run into cases in which, after releasing a library class, they suddenly experience what in French is called esprit de l'escalier or wit of the staircase: a great thought which unfortunately is an afterthought, like a clever reply that would have stunned all the other dinner guests - if only you had thought of it before walking down the stairs after the party is over. #Quote by Bertrand Meyer

#108. Manner is all in all, whate'er is writ,The substitute for genius, sense, and wit. #Quote by William Cowper

#109. If I was a flower, I would sell perfume.
If I was a plant, I would sell herbs.
If I was a seed, I would sell wood.
If I was a tree, I would sell forests.
If I was a garden, I would sell beauty.
If I was a plant, I would sell medicine.
If I was a fish, I would sell oceans.

If I was a bee, I would sell honey.
If I was a spider, I would sell silk.
If I was a firebug, I would sell light.
If I was a sheep, I would sell wool.
If I was a rabbit, I would sell carrots.
If I was a cow, I would sell leather.
If I was a hen, I would sell eggs.

If I was a stream, I would sell lakes.
If I was a river, I would sell seas.
If I was a bird, I would sell skies.
If I was a monkey, I would sell trees.
If I was a dog, I would sell plains.
If I was a bear, I would sell caves.
If I was a goat, I would sell mountains.

If I was a fox, I would sell wit.
If I was a dove, I would sell peace.
If I was a bear, I would sell valor.
If I was a camel, I would sell grit.
If I was an owl, I would sell wisdom.
If I was a lion, I would sell strength.
If I was an elephant, I would sell might. #Quote by Matshona Dhliwayo

#110. You can con God and get away with it, Granny said, if you do so with charm and wit. If you live your life with imagination and verve, God will play along just to see what outrageously entertaining thing you'll do next. #Quote by Dean Koontz

#111. Have you not a moist eye, a dry hand, a yellow cheek, a white beard, a decreasing leg, an increasing belly? Is not your voice broken, your wind short, your chin double, your wit single, and every part about you blasted with antiquity? #Quote by William Shakespeare

#112. Too many are sorry where they should be assertive, and nearly moved to aggressive radical action, where they should be apologizing to themselves first, and then the world at large. #Quote by Justin K. McFarlane Beau

#113. Your wit is always such a delight, Mr. Zeklos. I can barely contain myself around it. #Quote by Richelle Mead

#114. I have a black belt in sarcasm, and my wit is like lightning. #Quote by N.R. Walker

#115. Yeah, man. It's time to let de people get good herbs and smoke. Government's a joke. All dey wan' is ya smoke cigarettes and cigar. Some cigar wickeder den herb. Yeah, man, ya can't smoke cigar. Smoke herb. Some big cigar me see man wit', God bless! Me tell him must smoke herb. #Quote by Bob Marley

#116. Nobody thanks a witty man for politeness when he puts himself on a par with a society in which it would not be polite to show one's wit. #Quote by Friedrich Nietzsche

#117. Imyself haveheard averygood jest, and havescornedto seem to have so sillya wit as to understand it. #Quote by John Webster

#118. You'll find God in the same place you're going to find salvation from this mess," Wit said. "Inside the hearts of men. #Quote by Brandon Sanderson

#119. All his beauty, wit and grace
Lie forever in one place,
He who sang and sprang and moved
Now, in death, is only loved. #Quote by Alice Thomas Ellis

#120. The world is by no means averse to religion. In fact, it is devoted to it with a passion. It will buy any recipe for salvation as long as that formula leaves the responsibility for cooking up salvation firmly in human hands. The world is drowning in religion. But it is scared out of its wits by any mention of the grace that takes the world home gratis. #Quote by Robert Farrar Capon

#121. In a theater, it happened that a fire started offstage. The clown came out to tell the audience. They thought it was a joke and applauded. He told them again, and they became still more hilarious. This is the way, I suppose, that the world will be destroyed-amid the universal hilarity of wits and wags who think it is all a joke. #Quote by Soren Kierkegaard

#122. You can fake intelligence, but you can't fake wit. #Quote by Oscar Wilde

#123. Remembering where and why you fell and learning the lessons well is a good starting point to start all over again with a broaden insight and a renewed fortitude and wit to dare again for victory! #Quote by Ernest Agyemang Yeboah

#124. To be witty is not enough. One must possess sufficient wit to avoid having too much of it. #Quote by Andre Maurois

#125. I follow my own methods, and tell as much or as little as I choose. That is the advantage of being unofficial. #Quote by Arthur Conan Doyle

#126. Washington society has always demanded less and given more than any society in this country
demanded less of applause, deference,etiquette, and has accepted as current coin quick wit, appreciative tact, and a talent for talking. #Quote by M. E. W. Sherwood

#127. West had always congratulated himself on being too clever to desire a woman he couldn't have. But Phoebe was as rare as a year with two blue moons. All through dinner, he'd marveled at how beautiful she was, the candlelight striking gleams from her hair and skin like rubies and pearls. She was clever, perceptive, quick as a whip. There had been hints of an absolutely lacerating wit, which he loved, but there were also touches of shyness and melancholy that went straight to his heart. She was a woman who badly needed to enjoy herself, and he wanted to indulge her in some thoroughly adult fun. #Quote by Lisa Kleypas

#128. Anyway Ri Ri what rhymes wit your name really? Money got you vacationing in Chile #Quote by Nicki Minaj

#129. Breakin down the weed about to make a plane, a hundred niggas wit me all reppin taylor gang. #Quote by Wiz Khalifa

#130. The mind, relaxing into needful sport, Should turn to writers of an abler sort, Whose wit well managed, and whose classic style, Give truth a lustre, and make wisdom smile. #Quote by William Cowper

#131. Ciao, bello!' The coal-eyed beauty who had kissed Jason through the Fiat's window appeared through the crowd, her pretty red mouth smiling. Utterly ignoring Storm, she perched herself on the table next to Jason.

'Ciao, bella,' he smiled.

'Vuoi ballare?'

'She wants me to dance,' he explained to Storm, peering round the girl's adolescent bottom.

'I know,' she replied shortly. 'I've got a degree in Italian. #Quote by Madeleine Ker

#132. If a man's wit be wandering, let him study the mathematics. #Quote by Francis Bacon

#133. Swearing is, as I have said, learning to the ignorant, eloquence to the blockhead, vivacity to the stupid, and wit to the coxcomb. #Quote by Mary Collyer

#134. My ideal guy is my future husband. Not sure who he is yet, but he's out there. What impresses me in a gay guy? A warm smile, stubble, easy to talk to, thoughtful tattoos, kind eyes, wit, positivity, wanderlust, ambition, and a cute ass. #Quote by Tyler Oakley

#135. Wit is an intermittent fountain; kindness is a perennial spring. #Quote by Marie Von Ebner-Eschenbach

#136. I've been so thoroughly incorporated into the California culture that I practice meditation and go to a therapist, even though I always set a trap: during my meditation I invent stories to keep from being bored, and in therapy I invent stories to keep from boring the psychologist. #Quote by Isabel Allende

#137. With a title like this-There's a Box in the Garage You Can Beat with a Stick-is there really a whole lot left to say? With cunning and quintessential stealth, with artful restraint, with whats fathering and foxy and filled with intelligence and wit, Michael Teig goes about making what seems to be invisible and unspeakable, the most palpable and important matter in the world. #Quote by Dara Wier

#138. Satire is an abuse of wit. It corrects few evils. #Quote by Christian Nestell Bovee

#139. You are clever man, friend John; you reason well, and your wit is bold; but you are too prejudiced. You do not let your eyes see nor your ears hear, and that which is outside your daily life is not of account to you. Do you not think that there are things which you cannot understand, and yet which are; that some people see things that others cannot? But there are things old and new which must not be contemplate by men's eyes, because they know – or think they know – some things which other men have told them. Ah, it is the fault of our science that it wants to explain all; and if it explain not, then it says there is nothing to explain. But yet we see around us every day the growth of new beliefs, which think themselves new; and which are yet but the old, which pretend to be young – like the fine ladies at the opera. #Quote by Bram Stoker

#140. A keen wit stabs harder than a finely honed argument. #Quote by Rachel Hartman

#141. Borrowed wit is the poorest wit. #Quote by Johann Kaspar Lavater

#142. What the matter wit' your momma? She only know one name?' Stone #Quote by Ben Elton

#143. Brian Turner has given us not so much a memoir as a mediation, rendered with grace and wit and wisdom. If you want to know what modern soldiers see when they look at their world, read this book. #Quote by Larry Heinemann

#144. Slanders, sir, for the satirical rogue says here that old men have grey beards, that their faces are wrinkled, their eyes purging think amber and plum-tree gum, and that they have a plentiful lack of wit, together with most weak hams. #Quote by William Shakespeare

#145. Jason smiled and took a sip of his coke before responding. I'm not sure how to reply to that. I thought about just giving you a nasty look. But I see you already have one. #Quote by Mark A. Cooper

#146. I am a fool, I know it; and yet, Heaven help me, I'm poor enough to be a wit. #Quote by William Congreve

#147. They have a plentiful lack of wit. #Quote by William Shakespeare

#148. I am heartened to find so much wit in you, that you'd give thought to consequences and choose your way with reason, not passion only. #Quote by Deborah J. Lightfoot

#149. I wouldn't care to speculate about what it is in Westlake's psyche that makes him so good at writing about Parker, much less what it is that makes me like the Parker novels so much. Suffice it to say that Stark/Westlake is the cleanest of all noir novelists, a styleless stylist who gets to the point with stupendous economy, hustling you down the path of plot so briskly that you have to read his books a second time to appreciate the elegance and sober wit with which they are written. #Quote by Terry Teachout

#150. Ignorance is a poor tool in a battle of wits. #Quote by Thomas Jefferson

#151. Men whose wit has been mother of villainy once have learned from it to be evil in all things. #Quote by Sophocles

#152. For wit and judgment often are at strife, Though meant each other's aid, like man and wife. #Quote by Alexander Pope

#153. Far be it from me to slow down two badass supermodels on a mission, but we have a problem," a male voice said wryly.
I could see Christian out of the corner of my eye as we turned, his stance and movements almost synchronized to my own. We shared a look, our expressions almost identically similar, wit arched brows and half-smiles.
"What's the problem?" I called out, scanning the faces to see who had spoken.
"You're a badass supermodel," Christian muttered under his breath at the same time, taking the mature approach, as usual. #Quote by Rebecca K. Lilley

#154. It was like orderin a hamburger and getting only the buns
(After Brooke White of season 7 on american idol sang the song 'Hero'
by Mariah Carey) #Quote by Simon Cowell

#155. I've traveled all over the world for the Institute, but I never dreamed I'd meet someone like you."
"Strong?"
A chuckle escaped her. "Yes."
"Handsome?"
"Of course."
"Sharp of wit and skilled with a sword?"
"Absolutely." An other chuckle. "But I mean a man ... friend ... guy. Oh, I don't know what to call you!"
He savored her amusement - and her earnest words. "Just call me yours. That is all I want to be."
(Ashlyn and Maddox) #Quote by Gena Showalter

#156. Wit was insulting each person as they stepped onto the island. "Brightness Marakal! What a
disaster that hairstyle is; how brave of you to show it to the world. Brightlord Marakal, I wish you'd
warned us you were going to attend; I'd have forgone supper. I do so hate being sick after a full meal.
Brightlord Cadilar! How good it is to see you. Your face reminds me of someone dear to me."
"Really?" wizened Cadilar said, hesitating.
"Yes," Wit said, waving him on, "my horse. Ah, Brightlord Neteb, you smell unique today - did you
attack a wet whitespine, or did one just sneeze on you? Lady Alami! No, please, don't speak - it's much
easier to maintain my illusions regarding your intelligence that way. And Brightlord Dalinar." Wit nodded
to Dalinar as he passed. "Ah, my dear Brightlord Taselin. Still engaged in your experiment to prove a
maximum threshold of human idiocy? Good for you! Very empirical of you. #Quote by Brandon Sanderson

#157. What an ornament and safeguard is humor! Far better than wit for a poet and writer. It is a genius itself, and so defends from the insanities. #Quote by Walter Scott

#158. See, some guys prefer asses
Some prefer tits
And I'm not saying that I don't like those bits
But what's more important
What supersedes
Is a girl a with passion, wit and dreams
So I want a girl who reads. #Quote by Mark Grist

#159. Generally speaking, there is more wit than talent in the world. Society swarms with witty people who lack talent. #Quote by Antoine Rivarol

#160. Artists must be men of wit, consciously or unconsciously philosophers; read, study and think a great deal of life ... #Quote by Robert Henri

#161. Twas the saying of an ancient sage that humour was the only test of gravity, and gravity of humour. For a subject which would not bear raillery was suspicious; and a jest which would not bear a serious examination was certainly false wit. #Quote by Anthony Ashley Cooper, 1st Earl Of Shaftesbury

#162. Some grief shows much of love,
But much of grief shows still some want of wit. #Quote by William Shakespeare

#163. To whom shall I offer this book, young and sprightly,
Neat, polished, wide-margined, and finished politely?
To you, my Cornelius, whose learning pedantic,
Has dared to set forth in three volumes gigantic
The history of ages - ye gods, what a labor!
And still to enjoy the small wit of a neighbor.
A man who can be light and learned at once, sir,
By life's subtle logic is far from a dunce, sir.
So take my small book - if it meet with your favor.
The passing of years cannot dull its sweet savor. #Quote by Catullus

#164. Come, Sleep; O Sleep! the certain knot of peace,
The baiting-place of wit, the balm of woe,
The poor man's wealth, the prisoner's release,
Th' indifferent judge between the high and low;
With shield of proof shield me from out the prease
Of those fierce darts Despair at me doth throw. #Quote by Philip Sidney

#165. ...unfortunately, I am incapable of thinking up perfectly biting, split-second retorts, in any language. The French even have a word for this: l'esprit de l'escalier; staircase wit, something you only think of on the way out. #Quote by Tania Aebi

#166. He liked such sharpness, for there was nothing in him that had any blood you might spill. #Quote by Madeline Miller

#167. Those who cry out the truth to an indifferent world too often weary, fall silent or come to doubt their own wit. #Quote by Iris Murdoch

#168. Exposed! shines a harsh light on the myriad horrors of modern society and reports back from the fearful frontlines with wicked wit and paranoid power. From the murky waters of New Orleans to the scarred psyches of our own image-obsessed existence, Exposed! is the last headline we get to read before reality comes tumbling down. #Quote by Jeremy Robert Johnson

#169. Ay, that incestuous, that adulterate beast, With witchcraft of his wit, with traitorous gifts- O wicked wit and gifts, that have the power So to seduce! #Quote by William Shakespeare

#170. Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit. #Quote by Aristotle.

#171. And when reproached with this Sam with ready wit replied that paralysed as he was, from the waist up, and from the knees down, he had no purpose, interest or joy in life other than this, to set out after a good dinner of meat and vegetables in his wheel-chair and stay out committing adultery until it was time to go home to his supper, after which he was at his wife's disposal. #Quote by Samuel Beckett

#172. Wanting a woman was something he knew quite well - but wanting to take care of a woman so that she would never hurt, never want, never be afraid or lonely - he had no experience with that. There had been beautiful women in his past; intelligent women, clever women, women with wit and courage and passion, but as far as he could remember, never one like Mel; never before a woman who had everything he'd ever wanted. #Quote by Robyn Carr

#173. The struggle for justice should never be abandoned because of the apparent overwhelming power of those who seem invincible in their determination to hold on to it. That apparent power has, again and again, proved vulnerable to human qualities less measurable than bombs and dollars: moral fervor, determination, unity, organization, sacrifice, wit, ingenuity, courage, patience. #Quote by Howard Zinn

#174. Rob Chilson's mordant wit will keep you turning the pages until the wee hours! #Quote by Algis Budrys

#175. You know, you're rather amusingly wrong. #Quote by Terry Pratchett

#176. Converse with men makes sharp the glittering wit, but God to man doth speak in solitude. #Quote by John Stuart Blackie

#177. Remember that the wit, humour, and jokes of most mixed companies are local. They thrive in that particular soil, but will not often bear transplanting. #Quote by Lord Chesterfield

#178. From authors whom I read more than once I learn to value the weight of words and to delight in their meter and cadence
in Gibbon's polyphonic counterpoint and Guedalla's command of the subjunctive, in Mailer's hyperbole and Dillard's similes, in Twain's invectives and burlesques with which he set the torch of his ferocious wit to the hospitality tents of the world's colossal humbug ... I know no other way out of what is both the maze of the eternal present and the prison of the self except with a string of words.
- from Harper's Notebook, November 2010 #Quote by Lewis H. Lapham

#179. He that has a little tiny wit,
With hey, ho, the wind and the rain,
Must make content with his fortunes fit,
Though the rain it raineth every day. #Quote by William Shakespeare

#180. The banalities of a great man pass for wit. #Quote by Alexander Chase

#181. Nutt was technically an expert on love poetry throughout the ages and had discussed it at length with Miss Healstether, the castle librarian. He had also tried to discuss it with Ladyship, but she had laughed and said it was frivolity, although quite helpful as a tutorial on the use of vocabulary, scansion, rhythm and affect as a means to an end, to wit getting a young lady to take all her clothes off. At that particular point, Nutt had not really understood what she meant. It sounded like some sort of conjuring trick. #Quote by Terry Pratchett

#182. Idleness of the mind is much worse than that of the body: wit, without employment, is a disease - the rust of the soul, a plague, a hell itself. #Quote by Samuel Smiles

#183. A cabaret song has got to be written - for the middle voice, ideally - because you've got to hear the wit of the words. And a cabaret song gives the singer room to act, more even than an opera singer. #Quote by James Fenton

#184. Wit: a whim followed by a wham. #Quote by Mason Cooley

#185. Have you ever fired one of those before?" Peter teases. "How hard can it be?" The first time we said those words seems like lifetimes ago. "I don't know, but you make it look nearly impossible." "You're hilarious. Who needs a gun when you can just knock 'em dead with your wit?" "I am pretty witty. So, are you ready?" "No, are you?" "Not in the slightest." "Oh good, we're all set then. #Quote by Jamie Canosa

#186. If he had a little more brains he would be a half-wit. #Quote by Barbara W. Tuchman

#187. Wit lies in recognizing the resemblance among things which differ and the difference between things which are alike. #Quote by Madame De Stael

#188. Sometimes we meet a fool with wit, never one with discretion. #Quote by Francois De La Rochefoucauld

#189. Men of wit, learning and virtue might strike out every offensive or unbecoming passage from plays. #Quote by Jonathan Swift

#190. To Dewey, if brevity was the soul of wit, stagecraft was the very center of politics. #Quote by David Pietrusza

#191. All the misfits of the world--the too fat and too lean, the too tall and the too short, the jerk, the drip, the half-wit and the spastic, the harelip and the gimp. All the broken, the doomed, the drunk and the disillusioned--herding together for a little human warmth, where a one-room kitchenette is an apartment and the naked electric bulb hangs suspended from the ceiling like an exposed nerve #Quote by Lawrence Lipton

#192. What do you do when the story changes in midlife? When a tale you have told yourself turns out to be a little untrue, just enough to throw the world off-kilter? It's like leaving the train at the wrong stop: You are still you, but in a new place, there by accident or grace, and you will need your wits about you to proceed. #Quote by Gail Caldwell

#193. His foe was folly and his weapon wit. #Quote by Anthony Hope

#194. If you have wit, use it to please and not to hurt: you may shine like the sun in the temperate zones without scorching. #Quote by Lord Chesterfield

#195. The wit of a graduate student is like champagne. Canadian champagne. #Quote by Robertson Davies

#196. What good is it if they miss your face but not your mind? #Quote by Crystal Woods

#197. We dare not trust our wit for making our house pleasant to our friend, so we buy ice cream. #Quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson

#198. And so we go and I meet his parents. And it's a very strange thing meeting your girlfriend's boyfriend's parents for the first time. Part of you is angry for obvious reasons and part of you still wants to make a good impression. On a side note, they seemed in perfect health. #Quote by Mike Birbiglia

#199. Listen," he said still breathing hard, "I'm sorry. I have no right to lecture you." His voice warmed with a devastating smile and his voice lowered a sensual octave. Before he had a chance to stop them, his thoughts rolled off his tongue. "But, darlin', you're a mighty tempting sight in those pants. It does things to a man, things you're too innocent to know about."
Willow swallowed hard, his hot look stealing her usual spontaneous wit. Dropping her gaze from his, she stammered, "I...It's getting late. We better go. #Quote by Charlotte McPherren

#200. Cressida: My lord, will you be true?
Troilus: Who, I? Alas, it is my vice, my fault:
Whiles others fish with craft for great opinion,
I with great truth catch mere simplicity;
Whilst some with cunning gild their copper crowns,
With truth and plainness I do wear mine bare.
Fear not my truth: the moral of my wit
Is "plain and true"; there's all the reach of it. #Quote by William Shakespeare