Claire Jamie Humor Quotes

#1. Well I am still not drunk" I straightened up against the pillows as best I could. "You told me once that if you could still stand up, you weren't drunk."
You aren't standing up." he point out.
You are. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#2. I wish I could have fought him for you," he said abruptly, looking back at me. His blue eyes were dark and earnest.
I smiled at him, touched.
"It wasn't your fight, it was mine. But you won it anyway." I reached out a hand, and he squeezed it.
"Aye, but that's not what I meant. If I'd fought him man to man and won, ye'd not need to feel any regret over it." He hesitated. "If ever - "
"There aren't any more ifs," I said firmly. "I thought of every one of them yesterday, and here I still am."
"Thank God," he said, smiling, "and God help you." Then he added, "Though I'll never understand why."
I put my arms around his waist and held on as the horse slithered down the last steep slope.
"Because," I said, "I bloody well can't do without you, Jamie Fraser, and that's all about it. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#3. Welcome to the blood bath! If you are looking for Economics 101 ... you are in the wrong fucking place, my friend! If you seek the Circle, this is Mecca! #Quote by Jamie McGuire

#4. Also," Nick added curtly, "I'm sorry about your face."
Jamie looked over his shoulder, and touched the demon's mark crawling along his jaw with the back of his hand. "Sorry about saving all our lives by doing something you had to do?"
"Oh no," Nick said blandly, "I just meant, you know. Generally."
Jamie stared at him, shocked, and laughed. It was a real laugh, helpless and sweet, and Mae memorized it in case he died. Jamie by the river at dawn, laughing. #Quote by Sarah Rees Brennan

#5. 'You've got a smart mouth, boy. And you swear too much. I should do what your mama failed to do and soap out your filthy mouth.'
Unwilling to hide the smirk, Jamie flashed it unrepentantly. 'Shit, your organic-oatmeal-and-mint soap probably tastes better than your cookies. Bring it on.' #Quote by Finn Marlowe

#6. Don't defend him! This is bullshit!" he said as he turned for the door, and then turned back to face me. "I've been sitting at work this whole time, staring at those fucking things. I wanted to calm down before I got here, but this is just . . . it's fucking disrespectful, is what it is! I bust my ass trying to prove to you that I'm better for you than he ever was. But he keeps pulling this shit, and showing up, and . . . I can't compete with some rich college boy from California. I'm barely getting by, with no degree, and up until a few days ago I still lived with my dad. But I am so fucking in love you, Cami," he said, reaching for me. "I have been since we were kids. The first time I saw you on the playground, I knew what beauty was. The first time you ignored me was my first broken heart. I thought I was playing this right, from the moment I sat down at your table at the Red. No one has ever wanted someone as much as I want you. For years I . . ." He was breathing hard, and he clenched his jaw. "When I heard about your dad, I wanted to rescue you," he said, chuckling, but not out of humor. "And that night at your apartment, I thought I'd finally gotten something right." He pointed to the ground. "That my purpose in life was to love you and keep you safe . . . but I didn't prepare for having to share you. #Quote by Jamie McGuire

#7. You wouldn't let him do it, would you, Jamie?"
Jamie's expression was very serene. She stared at Andrew when she spoke to her husband.
"With your permission, I would like to answer him."
"You have it," Alec replied.
"Andrew," she called out in a voice as cold and clear as a frigid winter morning, "my
husband does whatever he wishes to do. I am sometimes allowed to help, though. If he
decides to cut off your feet, I will, of course, offer him my assistance. #Quote by Julie Garwood

#8. I regarded him gently over my own bowl of stew. He was very large, solid, and beautifully formed. And if he was a bit battered by circumstance, that merely added to his charm.
"You're a very hard person to kill, I think," I said. "That's a great comfort to me. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#9. One little joke involving hemorrhagic fever and they brand you 'unstable #Quote by Michelle Hodkin

#10. But it wouldn't have half the power of a story in which Jamie and Claire truly conquer real evil and thus show what real love is. Real love has real costs - and they're worth it. I've always said all my books have a shape, and Outlander's internal geometry consists of three slightly overlapping triangles. The apex of each triangle is one of the three emotional climaxes of the book: 1) when Claire makes her wrenching choice at the stones and stays with Jamie, 2) when she saves Jamie from Wentworth, and 3) when she saves his soul at the abbey. It would still be a good story if I'd had only 1 and 2 - but (see above), the Rule of Three. A story that goes one, two, three, has a lot more impact than just a one–two punch. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#11. They do say money is the root of all evil."
I thought that was supposed to be the love of money."
There's neat for you. 'Tis them without it that loves it best. #Quote by Jamie O'Neill

#12. And what's wrong wi' the way ye smell?' he said heatedly. 'At least ye smelt like a woman, not a damn flower garden. What d'ye think I am, a man or a bumblebee? Would ye wash yourself, Sassenach, so I can get within less than ten feet of ye? #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#13. For my sake," he said firmly, addressing the air in front of him as though it were a tribunal, "I dinna want ye to bear another child. I wouldna risk your loss, Sassenach," he said, his voice suddenly husky. "Not for a dozen bairns. I've daughters and sons, nieces and nephews, grandchildren - weans enough."

He looked at me directly then, and spoke softly.

"But I've no life but you, Claire."

He swallowed audibly, and went on, eyes fixed on mine.

"I did think, though . . . if ye do want another child . . . perhaps I could still give ye one. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#14. You two sure are sleeping late for grown-ups. Did you stay up praying again last night?" "Praying?" Jamie asked with a frown. "What do you mean praying?" Reggie was one of the most deep-thinking children he had ever met, so figuring out what Reggie was talking about always required total concentration. "I heard you the other night." Searching the annals of his memory, Jamie came up with nothing. He bit his lip to stop it from twitching at the frustrated look Reggie threw him when he shook his head in confusion. With an exaggerated roll of his eyes that made him look even more like a miniature Luke, Reggie elaborated in his best 'my god, you're actually my teacher?' voice. "You know… Daddy kept saying oh God and you shouted Jesus a lot. You even said Jesus Luke," Reggie said with a shrug. "I dunno why. Everyone knows it's Jesus Christ. #Quote by Lisa Worrall

#15. Claire. The name knifed across his heart with a pain that was more racking than anything his body had ever been called on to withstand. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#16. You might not be the first person l kissed, but you will be the last' Jamie to Claire in Outlander (not word perfect) #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#17. I moved up beside Jamie."I have to go."
She frowned at me. "Where?"
I pressed a hand to the bottom of my belly. "My bladder.It-"
Ah." She gave a small laugh. "We interrupt this life-or-death situation for a pregnancy pee break. Don't see that in the movies, do you? #Quote by Kelley Armstrong

#18. It's a bit undignified to get into, but it's verra easy to take off"
"How do you get into it?" I asked curiously.
"Well, ye lay it out on the ground, like this" -he knelt, spreading the cloth so that it lined the leaf-strewn hollow- "and then ye pleat it every few inches, lie down on it, and row."
I burst out laughing, and sank to my knees, helping to smooth the thick tartan wool. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#19. And how is Jamie doing?"
"Fine. He seems to be spending a lot of time in the shower," I noted quietly, my voice so low that even Jamie's super hearing couldn't pick it up.
Dick chuckled, followed by Zeb and Gabriel.
"What?"
"Remember that summer I turned thirteen and my mom complained that she couldn't ever get me out of the bathroom?" Zeb asked.
"Yeah, but that's because you were-" I slapped my hand over my mouth. "Oh!"
"Welcome to the wonderful world of parenting," Zeb said. ""It's one big, horrifying miracle."
"Augh!" I grumbled. #Quote by Molly Harper

#20. The last time I had sex," I said, "was Halloween."
He nodded slowly. "That was my birthday."
I choked on my waffle. This was getting worse and worse. "No!"
"Why do you think they called me 'Poe'?" I had always guessed it was because he was morose and taciturn and creepy.
"Um ... because 'Hotstuff' was taken? #Quote by Diana Peterfreund

#21. The overseer wouldna speak to me of Ian, but he told me other things that would curl your hair, if it wasna already curled up like sheep's wool." He glanced at me, and a half-smile lit his face, inspite of his obvious perturbation.
"Judging by the state of your hair, Sassenach, I should say that it's going to rain verra soon now. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#22. I didn't say you shouldn't worry, do you think I don't worry? But no, you probably can't do anything about me.' 'Well, maybe no, Sassenach, and maybe so. But I've lived a long enough time now to think it maybe doesna matter so much
so long as I can love you.' -Claire & Jamie Fraser #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#23. It's important to take life very seriously. That is why we must laugh at every opportunity. #Quote by Jamie Arpin-Ricci

#24. Ah, such a glorious day! It was all going so well! #Quote by Jamie Thompson

#25. If I were marooned here till it suited my overbearing, domineering, pig-headed jackass of a husband to finish risking his stupid neck, I'd use the time to see what I could spot. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#26. And when my body shall cease, my soul will still be yours, Claire--- I swear by my hope of heaven, I will not be parted from you. --Jamie #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#27. What kind of husband would I be if I bet against my own marriage?'
I smiled. 'The stupid kind. Didn't you listen to your dad when he told you not to bet against me? #Quote by Jamie McGuire

#28. There was only one small probelm. It wasn't Frank I reached for, deep in the night, waking out of sleep. It wasn't his smooth, lithe body that walked my dreams a roused me so that I came awake moist and gasping, my heart pounding from the half-remembered touch. But I would never touch that man again.
"Jamie," I whispered. "Oh Jamie. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#29. That's the exciting part about capitalism. It's like surfing, you have to catch the wave. - Martin Peter (aka Vermin Gobsmack) #Quote by Jamie Delano

#30. For the moment, everything had disappeared: the church, the battle, the screams and shouts and the rumble of limber wheels along the rutted road through Freehold. There wasn't anything but her and him, and he opened his eyes to look on her face, to fix it in his mind forever. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#31. He pressed me firmly to him, and I could feel that he was more than ready to get on with the business at hand. With some surprise, I realized that I was ready too. In fact, whether it was the result of the late hour, the wine, his own attractiveness, or simple deprivation, I wanted him quite badly. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon

#32. I was crying and laughing, snuffing tears and blood, bumping at him with my bound hands, trying awkwardly to thrust them at him so that he could cut the rope. He quit grappling, and clutched me so hard against him that I yelped in pain as my face was pressed against his plaid. He was saying something else, urgently, but I couldn't manage to translate it. Energy pulsed through him, hot and violent, like the current in a live wire, and I vaguely realized that he was still almost berserk; he had no English. #Quote by Diana Gabaldon